Obituaries?

I have to say, I do think the idea of writing your own obituary is very creepy. But aside from the creepiness, Another problem that I have with it is the idea of writing down all your accomplishments and feats or whatever. I believe that half the fun of life is the mystery, the fact that you have NO idea where your life is going. I don't have a big problem with the idea of writing the obituary; it's great to set goals for yourself and even greater to follow through with them. Its the idea that you could possibly know anything about the way that your life could turn out. A better exercise would be to simply write down your goals.

ANYWAY, I definitely enjoyed Mrs. Walker's presentation, and I thought she looked great for her age ;). But seriously, I am a huge fan of "following your bliss", a philosophy of life given a name by Joseph Campbell. Anyway, Mrs. Walker certainly seems to be following her bliss, wherever it takes her, even if it means getting a PhD at 50. It was extremely inspiring to hear that you really can do whatever you really want to do, if it makes you happy. I would count myself lucky to have a story like hers by the time I die. Hmmm, maybe I'll write myself an obituary...

Reflection Week 2: How Planning is Epic but Necrologies Aren't Thematically Fitting

I immediately felt repelled to Danna Walker's idea of composing a personal obituary. I am reminded of Emmeline Grangerford from The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, the girl who had a hobby of perusing the daily paper for obituaries and writing "tributes" to the dead. Eerie and disturbing, and also in no way related to the Explorations course at hand.

The main reason for my obituary pass deals with mentioning death. College. (Don't go together, do they?) Freshman year! Isn't this a decisive, lively stage of life? If so, should we not attempt to grasp its significance and clutch, seize the LIFE before us? I am not implying we should not plan our courses of action in advance. Like Basil S. Walsh said, "If you don't know where you are going, how can you expect to get there?"

Let's create and delineate what we want to accomplish. Even the most (seemingly) absurd and improbable achievements, things, places, careers. Ones so sweet, alluring, tempting... and quenching, like that Häagen Dazs Sorbet Sipper on a sultry day. Whatever you dreamed of as a kid, when no one yet bothered to put you down and tell you that you couldn't, you shouldn't, you wouldn't. Want to be an astronomer? Put it on paper. Hang the line on your cinder block wall, scribble it with a Sharpie, stare at it, foster and kindle a fire, glow ardent with aim.

As one concept that Danna Walker pointed out indicates - the subconscious mind works for you. Once an idea and desire so strong and fervent is instilled within the fibers of your being, you better know you're getting it, you're getting there. With a "grand plan," she said, "the subconscious is working for you and things along the way just lead to it [what you want]. Opportunities open up." Or perhaps your mind turns receptive. Once a path is delineated, it is conscious to opportunities, and you act accordingly. We need to delineate to act purposefully, walk the right roads, end up at the desired destinations.

As goes for myself, I've laid out my masterplan, and I review it to consider my current sources of joy and plausible choices of career. But no obituaries. I prefer the attitude of life and the now. Pondering over my gravestone makes me uncomfortable, just as the notions of a "bucket list" and the "1,000 Books/Movies/Records/Places You Must Read/See/Hear/Visit BEFORE YOU DIE." Popular culture rushes us. Hurry, hurry, before you die! I'm suprised the Grim Reaper isn't juxtaposed on the book cover, scythe suspended ominously over all your dream island locations. Get to Majorca, quick, before it's too late! Death is a fact of life, but at this stage in ours, should we regard it as imminent? Granting thought to the notion of not being alive, free to frolic... not appealing!

Perhaps I over-thought this obituary writing-advice. I just found it very distressing.

But regardless. Live out today like you mean it - is what matters. (And Danna Walker also said not to worry so much. Slightly conflicting, but just maybe, no need for predictions of life/death at 80? Or 150?) Just to manifest my preferred take on existence, one I derived from the genius of Dale Carnegie, I would like to share a few lines I've got scotch-taped to my desk, to see and reflect upon daily:

Saluation to the Dawn

Look to this day!
For it is life, the very life of life.
In its brief course
Lie all the verities and realities of your existence
>The bliss of growth
>>The glory of action
>>>The splendor of beauty.
For yesterday is but a dream
And tomorrow is only a vision,
But today well lived makes every yesterday a dream of
>>happiness
And every tomorrow a vision of hope.
Look well, therefore, to this day!
Such is the salutation to the dawn.

Kalidasa, Indian Poet

No whens, ifs, buts. No "when I am a junior", "once I graduate", "when I'll have a family" ("when I grow up"). No looking to the future to reap your joys of life, no hold-offs. Breathe and create now. Touch your nose, blink your eyes, pull your ear. Tough developing a sufficiently forcible ending that would exude the value we so frequently disregard. Simply miss.

This instance is life in the purest.

Are You Seriously Telling Me This?

When Danna Walker visited our class this past Friday she made a comment that left me completely dumbstruck. She said that a very helpful piece of advice she could give would be for us to stop stressing so much. I stared at her in absolute amazement. I began to wonder if maybe she didn't realize that she was talking to a group of college freshmen. I mean, telling a group of undergrads not to stress is like telling them not to breathe. . . for me anyway. And isn't part of the college package, besides dealing with a disorganized bookstore, loads and loads of stress? I began to think of how much I worry about school. And the more I thought and thought, I realized that I pretty much worry about everything. I worry about such insignificant things that really shouldn't be bothered with. I realized how much time is wasted worrying, time that can be put to better use.

The more I thought about this stress problem I began to wonder if maybe stress stemmed from self-doubt. There are moments when I question what it is that I can and can't do and there and these are the moments when the worrying begins. So I should no longer question my abilities and worry about my weaknesses but rather act on my strengths. After all, great things aren't achieved by the meek and the close-minded but rather by those who are willing to dive into things without any sense of fear or stress.

My Obituary as inspired by Danna Walker

So in order to think of my grand plan for life that should hold true until I am at least fifty, I elected to perform an exercise that was suggested by Danna Walker, our speaker for today. I found it fitting for our reflection exercise since I will be reflecting on what I want out of life. Dr. Walker said that it should be interesting and helpful for one to write a personal obituary. I trust that it will be beneficial because Dr. Walker was very insightful on the topic of life. So here it goes, and though I am a little weary to write this, because I DO NOT want to die any time soon, I will give it my best and hopefully it doesn't sound too impractical. Though if you have read my other posts you will realize I am the epitome of an idealist.

Miranda, daughter of William and Annette, and sister to Arianne, died last night in her sleep at the age of 105. Graduate of American University, Class of 2013, with a major in International Service, Miranda also went on to receive her masters from Columbia University in 2015 in International Affairs. After establishing herself as a leading figure in the international world, Miranda fought to share the power of an education to children in developing nations. Miranda always spoke passionately about her education, and she wished for other children to be influenced by it. Thus, she started her own non- profit organization, Education and Empowerment, for this cause in 2022. However, Miranda also sought to ameliorate the educational system of America, and she frequently testified before Congress throughout her lifetime. Miranda was happily married for eighty years, and her and her husband leave a son James, and twins Elizabeth and Alyssa. In lieu of flowers, please send donations to Education and Empowerment.


Wow, that was the weirdest thing I have ever written, and I am fearful of hitting the "Publish Post" button because there is a .01% chance that my life will turn out as I have described above. However, I learned many things from Dr. Walker's discussion today, and one of them is that even though one's plan may seem too fantastical, it is still not bad to wish for such things. And, as Dr. Walker conveyed, it is important to not let other factors be a deterrent in one's life. Dr. Walker was very helpful, and I think I am finally beginning to explore who I am and what I want to become, which is good because that is the point of this course! I have a feeling I'll look back at this post in fifty years and have a good laugh.

Drama Llama or Llama Drama?

3 months ago, I was at a YMCA in Gaithersburg, watching my brother swim. Now, those of you who have attended club swim meets know that they are full-day events, and my brother swam in both the first and the last events. So, I was in this YMCA for about 8 hours straight on a lovely Saturday. During one of the many breaks between my brother's events, I wandered into a room where I saw a glorious image floating before me. I pinched myself. Twice. I wasn't dreaming. There, mere feet in front of me, perched on the wall like a magnificent eagle, was a sublime wonder, a work of art.

"I must have it!" I muttered to myself, alarming several swimming moms around me.

It was a poster. Not just any poster, mind you. THE poster. The poster that would be the envy of all in my dorm. One poster to rule them all.

It was this poster.

It was so delightfully ridiculous and crazy that it was perfect. As I moved to rip it from the wall and stuff it into my pants, my normal poster-stealing method, a ripple of guilt went through me. I was in a YMCA. The young men's christian association. It would be tantamount to blasphemy, sacriligion to follow through with my devious plan. So I didn't take it. I couldn't.

A couple of weeks later, right before leaving for school, my mother said she had a going-away present for me. I couldn't believe my eyes when I unrolled THE POSTER! So, naturally, I thanked her profusely, and brought it straight to school.

I brought the poster for two reasons: one, it's hilariously ridiculous and actually kind of appropriate for a dorm room. Two, and more importantly, it reminds me that no matter what I do, no matter what I set upon as my goal, I have the support and love of my family behind me. They will always be there for me.

At first, according to one of my roommates, the poster made me appear to be a bit of a "doof", but once I explained the sentimental meaning of the poster, the aforementioned roomie thought me more sentimental than he had before. He also said that the poster described my personality in a way: "ridiculous, yet appropriate".

I'll take that.

The Joys of a Dirty Blanket

To state the obvious, Texas is an extremely hot place. It's the type of hot where every summer you're vying for the friendship of that neighbor kid you had never talked to all year but you know he has an amazing swimming pool in his backyard. However, Texas winters can also have their cruel moments. Therefore, a warm, cozy, blanket is always greatly appreciated. A blue five-year-old blanket was one of the first items that I packed into my suitcase when preparing to leave to DC. Printed in the front are the words "Houston, Texas" and on the top there's an imprint of a football helmet. I honestly have no idea who the Houston, Texans are in regards to the sport. The only reason why I even have this blanket in the first place is because it was bought as a last minute necessity for a school trip. Little did I know that this blanket would soon become an object of security and comfort. I became so accustomed to its warmth during winters that there was no way I was going to college without it. When others see this blanket they might think "oh, she's not accostumed to the cold so she really needs a blanket". They might even establish my identity as a childish person who constantly feels the need to be warm and enveloped. However,to me, this blanket represents everything that is warm and comfortable about home. To me, it has become a symbol and constant reminder that even though I have entered moments of self-discovery and independence by coming to college, you should never forget where you came from for that is where you first began.

When I asked my roommate Katie what she thought about the blanket her first guess was that I was proud to be from Texas. She was correct in this since I am proud that I come from the south (even if at times TX is not always seen in the best light). She then ventured to guess that I am a football fan. That was TOTALLY wrong since the only football games that I have ever seen were the ones that I was forced to watch in high school. But I do understand how this blanket could give off that impression. Her third opinion was that there was a certain childish side of me. In a way that is correct. Though I am not childish in character (I hope not anyways) I am childish in the way that just like little kids, I also like to cling on to things of great value to me. In the end, I learned that at times only the posessor of an item is the one who truly knows the true meaning behind their precious object.

PANDAmonium

I brought two stuffed panda bears to school for two reasons. One is that I cannot sleep without holding something in my arms, I guess this stems from always having a stuffed animal to sleep with throughout my entire life, and two because they do remind me of home. I have many more-- at least 5-- stuffed pandas at home. This accumulation began when I told people that pandas were my favorite animal many years ago. Actually, I do not remember when I decided that pandas were my favorite animal, but I do know that now I have a lot of panda paraphernalia, from tee shirts to most notably the stuffed animals that I brought to college. Therefore, these pandas remind me of home because pandas have long been a part of my life, and they are just very comfy to sleep next to. I think that my stuffed pandas portray to others that I am still a bit childish and very silly. When one looks at these pandas, one cannot help but smile because they are just funny- looking, and they are abnormally shaped creatures. Therefore, these pandas should convey to others that I do not take some things too seriously, and that I am able to laugh and be immature when the occasion arises.
On the other hand, when I asked the boys down the hall from Explorations what identity these pandas perform, they stated such things as "creature comfort... needed for security... a reminder of childhood." This is partly correct, but I did not see the pandas as a symbol for weakness and insecurity. It makes sense now, though. I mean if I need a panda to sleep with at night, then I obviously need a sense of security, but that word did not pop into my head until after I showed my pandas to other people. Someone also stated that the pandas showed that I like "Asian wildlife." I did not agree with this because I do not think I could name that many creatures from Asian besides the obvious, a panda. So this blog was insightful. I learned that even though I believed the pandas remind me of my past and my childhood, others do not know that I have had such a liking to pandas for such a long period of time. Others view the pandas as a symbol for comfort since I am away from home, even though when I am at home I still have the need to sleep with these black and white stuffed bears, too.